


Boy Problems

by icantbelieveitshalloween



Category: Dragalia Lost (Video Game)
Genre: M/M, everyone but johanna zardin and ranzal are barely involved, johanna is zardin's roommate
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-15
Updated: 2019-05-16
Packaged: 2020-03-06 00:22:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,295
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18839818
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/icantbelieveitshalloween/pseuds/icantbelieveitshalloween
Summary: Johanna and Zardin are roommates who tell each other everything. One day, Zardin tells Johanna that he has a crush on Ranzal. Johanna decides to take matters into her own hands to get her friend a date.





	1. Chapter 1

Johanna woke up to a familiar sound. Her roommate was talking to himself in the mirror and combing his hair at the ungodly hour of 7 AM. She would have never dreamed of waking up that early before coming to the castle, but ever since she was assigned Zardin as a roommate, she had to somewhat adjust to his schedule so she didn’t lose her mind. This meant going to bed and waking up earlier. When they had first become roommates, she couldn’t stand his incessant narcissism; she thought the man had lost his mind, constantly talking to himself in the mirror, waking up before the sun rose just to get started on his morning routine, and constantly carrying that damned hand mirror. Eventually she came to appreciate Zardin for his quirks, and slowly started to enjoy his company, even if it meant making some sacrifices.

Zardin and Johanna had been roommates for just over a month now. Euden didn’t want anyone to be left out, so he had assigned everyone to their rooms by random draw. This ensured that everyone would get a roommate, but it also led to some unfortunate pairings like these two. This pairing system caused Johanna to resent Zardin at first, to the point of attempting to attack him on many occasions, but she learned to live with it, and now her and Zardin were actually fairly good friends. At night in the hour between dinner and lights out, they would have a lively chat about their days and whatever had been troubling them recently. In the morning, they would banter and get ready to go about their days.

Johanna rolled out of bed, and spoke to her roommate. “Good morning, Zardin!” she exclaimed to the man across the room. 

Zardin did not even look away from his mirror, but returned her greeting. “Good morning, Johanna darling. What’s your plan for the day?” Johanna had still not grown used to Zardin referring to her as darling, but she knew he meant no harm from it, even if she didn’t take kindly to such flattery. 

“Oh nothing,” She told the man, “Just another day of patrollin’ the town and knockin’ out fiends.”

“Oh goodie!” Zardin enthusiastically replied, “Mind if we patrol together today, dear? I have much to talk to you about!”

Johanna wondered what Zardin could have to talk about that would take more than their nightly chats. He normally just talked about himself when they talked. Regardless, she accepted his offer, and as such, returned to her bed after finishing getting ready. She knew it would be a while before Zardin was finished applying his makeup and making sure his helmet was on just right.

By the time Zardin was ready to go, it was 9 AM. Zardin walked over to a sleeping Johanna and gently shook her awake. “Johanna dear, it’s time to go patrol.”

Johanna woke up from her unplanned nap and picked up her axe that was resting against her bedframe. “Alright, let’s head out!” She said, raising her axe triumphantly.

The two of them walked out of the castle in silence, not really saying much as they headed into the forests on the outskirts of town. They reached the forest and fixed their gear to be ready for patrol. It had been a quiet few weeks, so they were unlikely to encounter anything, but they always made sure to follow protocol just in case.

“So, what was it you wanted to chat about, pal?” Johanna asked Zardin.

Zardin began to respond, “Well, something has been bugging me recently… romantically…” As Zardin prepared to explain, a burly man in his signature yellow armor walked in the trees directly behind Johanna. Zardin stood up straight and blushed. “Oh, on second thought, it’s nothing. I’ll explain later.”

Johanna noticed Zardin’s strange reaction, and turned around, expecting there to be a fiend or something preventing Zardin from continuing. Instead, she saw the man that elicited that reaction from Zardin. Immediately, she pieced things together. “RANZA-” She yelled out questioningly. Zardin dived for the girl, covering up her mouth. The burly man in the woods turned around and walked towards the roommates, who were now on the ground, with Zardin’s palm pressed firmly over Johanna’s mouth.

“Hey guys, what’d you need? Thought I heard my name.” The buff man asked the two currently entangled in the grass, “Are you guys fighting AGAIN?”

Zardin removed his hand from Johanna’s mouth. “Oh, it’s nothing. Johanna was simply surprised to see you, since this is not normally where you patrol.” Zardin explained, trying to play off the situation at hand.

“Yeah, it’s nothing important,” Johanna said, attempting to back up her friend.

“In that case, why are you two on top of each other? That usually only happens if you guys are fighting,” Ranzal’s eyes lit up and he smirked, “Unless…”

“Oh heavens no! I would never dream of doing such lewd things with this woman! No offense, darling,” Zardin explained.

“None taken. You should be glad to know the feeling is entirely mutual. Now Ranzal, if you’re wondering, Zardin simply tripped in surprise from me yelling your name out of nowhere. Sorry, sometimes I tend to get a little… excited over small things,” Johanna explained.

“No worries! Well, if that’s all, I better get back to patrolling. Euden got reports that there’s gonna be more fiends in this area today, so he assigned a few extra people here just in case,” Ranzal said. As if they were summoned, 3 fiends appeared to the side of the 3 friends just as Zardin and Johanna stood back up. Johanna saw an opportunity to help her friend out in this situation. She figured he would be mad, but that would come later. While Ranzal was busy looking at the fiends, she shoved Zardin into the monsters. Zardin let out a shriek.

“Oh no!” Johanna cried out insincerely, “Zardin fell into the fiends and I don’t have my weapon because we both fell over and dropped them! Ranzal, save him!”

Ranzal wasted no time taking out the fiends, freeing Zardin from their grasp. Despite the fiends being gone, Zardin cried out in pain. “My ankle! My poor beautiful ankle is twisted! I don’t know if I’ll ever walk again!”

Johanna was unsure if Zardin was purposely playing up his reaction or if it was his normal theatrics. Regardless, it seemed to have affected Ranzal, as he lifted up Zardin like a bride and immediately started carrying him back to the castle.

“Johanna, I’m gonna drop off Zardin at the castle infirmary! Can you keep an extra good lookout on this area?” Ranzal asked, already walking towards the castle.

“Yeah, sure!” Johanna yelled out, “Just hurry back!” Zardin turned his head towards Johanna and glared. Johanna winked and mouthed the words ‘good luck’, then picked up her axe. Once her two friends were gone, she let loose a little. “ALRIGHT FIENDS, WHO WANTS SOME?” She yelled out, letting her hair blow behind in the wind as she swung her axe at the low level fiends charging towards her.

While Johanna dealt with the fiends, Zardin dealt with his own issue. His heart was racing, as anyone would being bridal carried by the object of their affections. Zardin was especially flustered due to the newness of this all to him. He had never really been interested in anyone but himself, but he found himself drawn to the large man he was currently being carried by. He was tall, strong, dependable, and kind-hearted, so Zardin understood why he felt how he did, but Ranzal was noticeably uninterested in beauty and seemingly anything related to vanity, which was something Zardin couldn’t come to terms with.

While Zardin’s mind was racing with all kinds of new thoughts, the man carrying him was seemingly oblivious. Ranzal was walking with a lot of purpose as he carried the much smaller man back to the castle. He did not say a word to the man in his arms, and Zardin was still far too struck to even attempt to say something. As such, the walk back, which was only a few minutes for Ranzal, felt excruciatingly long to Zardin; each second of silence seemed like an eternity as he gazed at the large man’s stoic face. Zardin was somewhat drawn in by Ranzal’s appearance from how close they were, as he could get up close and personal with Ranzal’s very defined facial features. While Zardin noticed some blemishes up close, which he would normally find reprehensible, he was still slowly drawn in by the man’s defined jawline and rich brown eyes. After what felt like ages to Zardin, the two men reached the infirmary, where Ranzal laid Zardin down on one of the beds.

Ranzal explained what had happened to Sophie, who was in charge of infirmary for that day, then told Zardin goodbye and to feel better before leaving to return to his patrol. He was usually a little frivolous in how he talked, but when it came to his work he was very quick and to the point in order to get things done. Zardin admired and, to some degree, resonated with this fact. After a few minutes of laying in the bed calming down from what happened, Zardin noticed Sophie take a seat in the chair next to his bed.

“So, Zardin, Ranzal explained to me what happened and I just took a look for myself. You have a sprained ankle, but that’s okay! It’s nothing my mana can’t fix!” Sophie explained as she got to work at healing, “Mana is so fascinating! Did you know that staves derive their mana from the wood they’re created from? Many assume the mana comes from the stone, but that is usually just to determine what type of spells the staff can cast! In actuality, the mana is determined by the type of wood used in the staff, as the wood…”

Sophie continued her explanation of mana to Zardin for hours as he was unable to move. Even as Zardin drifted to sleep, Sophie continued to talk about mana. When Zardin awoke, Johanna was at the foot of his bed.

“Hey bud! How ya feelin’?” She asked, smiling.

“Fine. What was that stunt you pulled earlier? You could have gotten me killed!” Zardin replied.

“Don’t be so overdramatic,” Johanna said, hand waving his concerns, “You’re fine! Those were low level fiends, and I figured it’d give you a chance to get close to your beloved!”

Zardin rolled his eyes as Johanna mockingly made kissy faces. “Oh, shut it. We shall discuss this more later. For now, let us return to our room,” He said, standing up from the infirmary bed and walking towards Johanna. The two of them waved to Sophie and returned to their room for their nightly chat.

“So, Zardin. Tell me everything,” Johanna said, looking legitimately interested in what her friend had to say.

“Well, you figured it out. I currently am attracted to that meathead,” He explained, attempting to act high and mighty.

“Keep going! What made you start liking him, what do you like about him, what are you gonna do about it?” Johanna rapid-fired questions.

“Well, it started out with a simple baseline attraction. He has very nice facial features and a nice body, so he piqued my interest. From there, I became conscious of him. I noticed how dependable he is, and how dedicated he is to protecting the castle, and I admired it. As for what I am going to do about it, I am unsure,” Zardin replied gracefully to each of his roommate’s questions.

“Aww, Zardin… I’ve never seen this side of you! If you ask me, you should try to get closer to him! You guys would be cute together!”

“Yes, I can tell very well that you approve considering you RISKED MY LIFE trying to make it work out,” Zardin raised his voice slightly to show his disapproval.

“Oh, come onnn, are you still on that? It worked out! You got bridal carried, your ankle is fine, and everyone’s happy. You should stop worrying and start planning your next course of action.”

“Well, what do you think I should do next?” Zardin asked the girl.

“I know! Why don’t you prepare a picnic as thanks for him saving you? All 3 of us have off tomorrow, so it’d be the perfect chance.”

“All 3 of us? What does you being there do for anything?”

“Oh, I won’t be at the picnic. I’ll be eavesdropping from nearby.”

“You do understand how creepy that sounds, right?”

“Don’t sweat the details, dude. Now, how about we get to work on that picnic basket? I’ll help you cook it! I may not be the best chef, but the two of us together can totally make something good!”

Zardin reluctantly agreed to Johanna’s scheming, and they went to the kitchen together to prepare the meal.

“Cleo just finished cleaning up dinner, so we better make sure to clean up after ourselves if we want to actually enjoy our day off!” Johanna told the man.

Zardin laughed.

“There’s my Zardin! Let loose a little bit! I’m sorry about earlier today, but look how nicely it’s worked out!”

“Okay, okay. I forgive you for earlier. Now, what should we make?”

“Well, that’s up to you, Zardin! It’s your crush you’re cooking for!

“It does not matter to me, so long as it is beautiful. It must look fantastic to truly express my feelings to that man.”

“Is that your way of saying you don’t have anything you know how to cook?”

“Of course I can cook something! I may not have cooked much before, but surely I can figure something out.”

Two hours passed as the pair tested recipes in an attempt to make something edible that Ranzal would like.

“This isn’t getting anywhere!” Johanna cried out, “We’ve been at this for 2 hours and we have nothing to show for it. Zardin, stay here. I’m gonna go get someone who can help us.”

“Okay, but be quick! It is nearing midnight and I need my beauty sleep!” Zardin yelled out as his friend rushed out the kitchen. He was confused as to who she could possibly be getting to help at this hour, but he didn’t question it.

A few minutes later, Johanna returned to the kitchen with a small assassin in tow. “What did you bring Vice for?” Zardin asked.

“Didn’t ya know? Vice is like a master chef AND he’s an assassin so he stays up late! Am I a genius or what?” Johanna explained smugly.

“What do you two need?” Vice asked menacingly. Johanna quickly got to work explaining the situation. After that was figured out, the trio decided to attempt to make some rice balls, as well as some side dishes like miniature omelets and weiners cut like octopuses.

After the trio finished creating a few lunches, the two roommates thanked Vice for his help and went their separate ways. The two of them returned to their room and promptly laid down. They both fell asleep almost immediately, with Zardin being tired from staying up past his normal hours and Johanna just being happy she stayed awake later than she recently has been able to.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> god beautician zardin's outfit is so hard to describe. it's cute but what the hell is he wearing

The next morning, Johanna tried to rush Zardin through his morning routine to get him to Ranzal as soon as possible.

“Johanna, I know you’re trying to help, but I must look my best today! If I am to spend my day with Ranzal, I want to look my best.” Zardin explained.

“Yeah, I get that, but if he leaves to go out on the town, who knows where he’ll turn up! You need to get out there as soon as possible to make sure that you get to him before he leaves,” Johanna replied.

Zardin knew Johanna had a point. They had woken up at 8 instead of their usual 7 due to staying up late last night, so he knew he would have to speed up the process if he wanted to catch Ranzal before he left the castle. Everyone in the castle knew that on days off Ranzal would always go wild in town; he would drink, chat up everyone he saw, and wouldn’t return to the castle until the wee hours of the night.

Zardin began to rush steps in his process. He did not take the minutes to admire himself between each of his steps in his makeup routine, and he didn’t even bother putting on his helmet, opting to leave his hair out. He combed it down, but without the helmet, he did not have to worry about making his hair stick out just right. He also opted not to wear his armor, instead putting on one of his normal outfits, which consisted of a long coat, a flowy scarf, white pants, and a pair of heels. It was a fairly intricate outfit, but not nearly as much as his armor which was several pieces of heavy metal that he would spend upwards of half an hour adjusting to conform to his body just right. By the time he was finished, it was still already 9:30, but there were only so many compromises he could make. Johanna simply watched, amazed that he was willing to compromise anything at all.

The two of them head out into the castle, and quickly picked up the picnic basket they had prepared last night from the kitchen. When they finally returned to entrance of the castle, they saw Ranzal chatting with Ezelith at the front doors, clearly preparing to leave. Johanna handed Zardin the basket and pushed him in Ranzal’s direction. Zardin used the momentum Johanna had given him to walk up to Ranzal and start a conversation just as Ezelith waved goodbye.

“Greeting Ranzal,” Zardin said to the man.

“Zardin! What’s up?” Ranzal replied with a smile.

“Well, I wanted to thank you for helping me yesterday, so I wanted to see if you were interested in enjoying a lunch I made together later.”

“That sounds amazing dude! I’ll never turn down a handmade lunch.” Ranzal said, capping it off with a hearty laugh.

Zardin was enamored with this man who laughed when nothing funny was happening and smiled at everyone he saw. “Alright, great. Meet me at the hill just past the forest at noon,” Zardin told the man.

“I’m there! See you later, man.” Ranzal replied, then walked out the castle door.

Johanna walked out from behind the statue she was eavesdropping behind as Zardin walked towards her. “Well, look at you go!” Johanna said to her friend, “Didn’t think you had it in you, but you’ve managed to swing a date with the man of your dreams!”

“Yes, well, I couldn’t have done it without you,” Zardin replied, being uncharacteristically humble.

“Of course, that’s what friends are for! Man, what would you do without me?” Johanna said, letting the praise go to her head a little bit. She feared Zardin’s narcissism was rubbing off on her.

“Calm down, Johanna, I still haven’t forgiven you for your antics yesterday. Don’t act all high and mighty just because you helped; that’s my job,” Zardin replied, laughing.

The two of them returned to their room, where Zardin immediately got to work fixing up the things that he had neglected earlier in the morning. He wanted to look absolutely dazzling for lunch later. He eyed the drawer of his vanity that had a lock on it. “You know… I could use a little extra flair for today,” He said, and pulled out a key from one of the other drawers that he kept hidden for emergencies.

Johanna walked over to him and yanked the key from his hand. “You better not be thinking about bringing out your ‘Ultra Zardin Makeup’ again! Last time you tried that you damn near blinded me!”

“Oh, come on, Johanna darling, you must admit that it makes me look simply ravishing.”

“It makes you look like nothing because no one can see you! I’m confiscating this key.” Johanna said, then hid the key away under her mattress while Zardin wasn’t looking.

“Well, I must get going. I want to have the picnic set up before he gets there, and the forest is a fairly long walk away,” Zardin said to his roommate before standing and walking towards the door. It was only 10:30, so it was clear that Zardin was anxious about everything going perfect.

“Alright, I’ll catch up later so I can keep watch on you two lovebirds,” Johanna replied. Once Zardin had been gone for a few minutes, she retrieved the key from under her mattress and took a seat at Zardin’s vanity. “Now then,” she said to herself, “Let’s see how I look in this supposedly ‘ultra’ makeup.”

Johanna unlocked the drawer, and took out the handcrafted palette. Zardin’s name was engraved on the outside, and on the inside was an array of different makeups. She and Zardin had vastly different complexions, but she figured it wouldn’t matter since it basically turned Zardin into a ball of light, which meant her face likely would not be visible.

She took one of Zardin’s many brushes and beauty blenders and began applying each of the various powders one by one. She didn’t know exactly how to apply makeup, but she had picked up on some things from watching Zardin apply his makeup every morning. After she applied each of the powders, she looked in the mirror and saw nothing but pure light. She had no idea how Zardin had done it, but she couldn’t even see herself from how glowy the makeup was.

Outside of the rooms, Cleo was sweeping the hallways. From underneath one of the doors, she saw a burst of light shining through and immediately knew what was going on. She swung open the door, ready to scold Zardin. “Zardin, what have I told you about- Johanna?” Cleo noticed that the person whose face was hardly visible any longer was not the resident makeup aficionado, but his roommate who had basically no interest in beauty, and oftentimes would lash out at those who tried to call her beautiful.

“Oh, um, hey Cleo,” Johanna shyly replied, “Listen, there’s a very good explanation for this.”

“Whatever it is, I have no interest in hearing it. Just take that damned makeup off and lock it away, and I’ll make sure this stays between us,” Cleo demanded, then closed the door behind her. Johanna quickly ran to the bathroom in her room and washed away the makeup, locking the palette back in the drawer, hopefully to never be seen again.

Meanwhile, Zardin was just reaching the hill where he and Ranzal were to enjoy their lunch. He tossed out the large blanket he had brought with him, and laid out the food and eating utensils that he had put in the basket. By the time he finished setting up, it was only 11:30, which left him with half an hour to anxiously wait.

Johanna left the castle at 11, hoping to reach the hill by 11:30 so she could support her friend from the sidelines. She took a side path to ensure that she wouldn’t run into Ranzal, but it caused her to take longer to get there. By the time she reached the hill, it was 11:45, and she saw Zardin laying on the blanket and tapping his fingers against the grass. She knew Ranzal wasn’t nearby yet because her side path gave her a good view of the main path, which she didn’t see him on even once, so she crept out of her hiding spot to give her friend a pep talk. Well, first she decided to have some fun with the situation. She snuck up behind Zardin and whispered into his ear, “Boo!” Zardin shrieked and turned around.

“Johanna? Why did you do that? What are you doing here? What if Ranzal sees you?” Zardin quickly spat out questions to his friend.

Johanna grabbed Zardin by the shoulder, looked him in the eye, and spoke, “Dude, you gotta calm down. This is gonna go fine. Just be yourself! You’re charming, nice, and funny. I’m sure he’ll like you.” After her pep talk, Johanna saw Ranzal running up the path, so she quickly ran back to her hiding place. “Good luck,” She whispered, before returning to her spot behind a nearby tree.

Ranzal reached the top of the hill, and called out to Zardin, “Hey! Are you okay? I heard a scream, so I ran up here as fast as I could.”

Zardin blushed, “Oh, you heard that? Hehehe… I simply, uh, saw a bug crawling on me. It’s no big deal really.”

Ranzal didn’t fully believe Zardin, but he was more interested in the spread of food before him. “Well, alright. If you say it was nothing, then I guess it’s nothing! Let’s eat!” Ranzal said, sitting down on the blanket across from Zardin.

The two of them began to eat, with Ranzal digging in, making a huge mess, while Zardin ate meticulously to make sure he did not get anything on his outfit. Johanna was watching in bored silence, hoping for something to happen. She picked up a nearby pebble and threw it at Zardin, hoping he would take the hint to initiate some conversation.

“Ouch!” Zardin said, turning to see Johanna glaring at him.

“What’s wrong?” Ranzal asked.

“Oh nothing, just bit my tongue.” Zardin said, trying to laugh it off.

“No, be honest with me Zardin. You’ve been acting weird since I got here. If something’s wrong, don’t hesitate to tell me,” Ranzal said, looking Zardin directly in the eye.

“Well,” Zardin began to open up, “It’s just that I wanted this to go perfectly, so I’m a bit nervous.”

“What’s there to be nervous about?” Ranzal asked, “The lunch is great! You really went above and beyond with this. I would’ve been fine with a simple thank you.”

“No, it’s not that. Gods, how do I explain this? It’s just… I really admire you Ranzal. You’re strong, caring, and you brighten up every room you’re in.”

“You think you aren’t those things? Dude, you literally light rooms up with how bright your makeup is, and you’re no slouch with a blade! As for being caring, this lunch proves that you’re extremely caring. Going so far out to thank a friend! That’s not something just anyone would do.”

Zardin tried his hardest to not bask in the compliments he was receiving. “I guess you have a point,” He replied, “Maybe admiration wasn’t the right word…”

“Well then, what’d you mean? You can tell me anything, you know.”

“No, I know, it’s just… Well, I’ve made it this far, may as well just tell you.” Zardin began, and from behind the nearby tree Johanna covered her mouth in shock at what was about to happen. “Ranzal, I have… feelings for you… like, romantically.”

Ranzal froze up, taking a second to process what he had heard. “HUH?” The man yelled out.

“Oh, I figured that was the reaction I’d get.” Zardin said dejectedly.

“No, no, it’s not that at all, it’s just… why me? I have no interest in beauty, I’m nowhere near as sophisticated as you, and I just don’t at all seem like your type.”

“Yes, I know, but it’s so much more than that. I already explained why I admire you, and over time those feelings of admiration became something else.”

“I understand; it’s just a bit unexpected y’kno.”

“Well, what do you say?”

“Can I have some time to think about it?”

“Oh, of course. No rush.”

“Now then, I oughta be headin’ back. Happy hour starts at the tavern soon, and I don’t wanna miss it. I’ll swing by tomorrow and we can chat. Thanks for this, Zardin. Regardless of the reason, this was a real nice gesture.” Ranzal stood up, and began to walk towards the path back to the castle.

Zardin started to clean up their lunch, blushing furiously. He was still in disbelief of the events that had just unfolded. He wasn’t the only one in disbelief, as Johanna finally came out from her hiding space and tackled Zardin in a hug.

“Zardin, I am SO proud of you! I can’t believe you did that. I hope it works out for you, pal,” Johanna said.

“Thank you, Johanna. If I am being honest, I didn’t think I had it in me, but I saw the chance and didn’t want to let it go by.”

“I’m glad you did it. Even if it doesn’t work out, you still got to tell him how you felt.”

“Hey Johanna, this is kind of off topic, but why do you smell like makeup? I didn’t think you wore any.”

Johanna blushed. “I dunno… maybe it’s just how I smell now that I’m around you all the time.”

“Johanna, what are you hiding from me?”

“OKAY, since you were so brave in doing this, I’ll tell you. While you were gone, I mayyy have tried out your special palette you keep locked up.”

Zardin broke from the hug and laughed for what seemed like minutes. “Oh, so I don’t get to use it, but you do? That’s rich, Johanna,” he said, continuing to laugh.

“Yeah, yeah, Cleo already scolded me. I don’t need to hear it from you too.”

“CLEO saw?? Oh, that is just the BEST. Thank you, Johanna. I feel MUCH better now.”

Johanna continued to blush. “Yeah, whatever,” she said, annoyed, “Let’s just get back to the castle.”


	3. Chapter 3

Ranzal had just returned to the castle. Happy hour at the tavern started in an hour, and he needed someone to go with. He needed someone smart and good with romance to help him understand what to do. Unfortunately, he didn’t know anyone like that, so he got Luca. Luca was in the kitchen setting up a prank when Ranzal grabbed him by the arm.

“Luca, buddy! You gotta help me!” Ranzal pleaded.

“Uh… What’s up, Ranzal?” Luca asked.

“Come with me to happy hour! I need to chat and get drunk!”

“I mean, I guess I can come. You know I can’t drink yet though, right?”

“Who cares? I said I need to get drunk, not you. Plus, it’s probably better that you’re sober because I need advice.”

Luca’s ears perked up. It wasn’t often that people came to him for advice, so he relished the opportunity. “Well, if you insist. Lead the way, old friend o’ mine!” Luca said.

Thus, the two of them headed to the tavern. They chatted about general stuff as Ranzal downed his first few drinks of the day. When Ranzal got his third drink, Luca decided bring up what Ranzal talked about earlier.

“So, what’d you need to talk about?” Luca asked.

“Oh, is nothin’ serious, man. Let’s jus talk about whatever,” Ranzal said, already beginning to slur words. His alcohol tolerance was surprisingly low considering his size.

“Nope! You brought me to this place for advice, so you’re getting it. Tell me what’s on your mind.”

“Well, Zardin told me he had feelings for me earlier, and I don’t know how to respond.”

“Wait, Zardin? As in constantly looking in the mirror, only ever talks about himself? That Zardin? I can’t believe it. I didn’t think he was capable of caring about anyone but himself!” Luca laughed.

“Yeah, that’s the one,” Ranzal answered.

“Well, I wasn’t really asking seriously. It’s not like Zardin is a very common name,” Luca said, laughing at his own joke.

“Look dude, I’m way too far gone to understand sarcasm. Just tell me what I should do.”

“Well, what do you want me to tell you? I can’t sort out your feelings for you. What do you think of him?”

“Well, he’s a nice guy. He’s friendly and a good listener, even if he’s a little narcissistic, and I will admit that he’s pretty easy on the eyes,” Ranzal explained in between sips of his third beer. When the bartender came to ask if Ranzal wanted another beer, Luca answered for him, cutting him off. Luca was invested in his story and was afraid another beer would make him too incoherent to get anything out off.

“It sounds like you’re at least interested in him. You should go for it!” Luca said.

“The thing is that I’ve never really seen him romantically though. I dunno, maybe I just haven’t considered it before now.”

“I mean, you don’t have to be interested in him romantically immediately. If you accept his feelings you could always go on a few dates and see how it goes.”

“I didn’t say I wasn’t interested in him romantically, I’m just sayin’ I haven’t thought about it.”

“So are you saying that now that you’ve that about it you ARE interested in him romantically?”

“Maybe it’s the booze talkin’, but I kind of think I am. We had lunch today and it was really nice. We sat and chatted for a few hours and it made me realize I enjoy his company.”

“Well, it sounds to me like you have your answer.”

“You’re right,” Ranzal replied, then stood up from his chair, “I’m gonna go tell him how I feel right now!”

Luca grabbed Ranzal’s arm as he started to leave the tavern, “Oh no you don’t! You’re going back to your room and sleeping. You can tell him in the morning,” Luca said to the much larger man.

Ranzal didn’t resist, and the two of them walked back to the castle together. As they walked back, Luca supported Ranzal who was hardly able to put one foot in front of the other. When they returned to the castle, Luca walked Ranzal to his room and made sure his friend made it to his bed. He walked out of the room, but before he shut the door Ranzal spoke up. “Hey Luca,” Ranzal said, barely conscious, “Thanks for the advice. You’re a good friend.”

Luca smiled, “No problem, pal,” he replied, “I know you’d do the same for me.” Luca shut the door to Ranzal’s room, and returned to his own.

The next morning, Ranzal awoke with a splitting headache. “Ugh,” he said to himself, “I should not have drank that much last night.” In actuality, Ranzal had only had 3 drinks, but even that was enough to make him hungover. Memories of last night’s conversation came back to him slowly, and he knew what he needed to do. He got up, got dressed, and ran out into the town. Ranzal was always one for theatrics, and he knew Zardin was as well, so he grabbed a bouquet from a nearby florist and hurried back to the castle. During their chat yesterday, Zardin explained that he always got finished getting ready at 9 AM sharp, and it was already 8:45, so Ranzal rushed back to the castle with the bouquet in his hands. He got some stares on his way back through the castle, including from Cleo who had never been so perplexed by a sight in her life. She had seen many a strange sight in that castle, but she never thought she’d see the day when Ranzal was running through the castle halls carrying a bouquet. Ranzal reached Zardin’s door at 8:55, and knocked. The door opened, and a girl with dark brown hair stood in front of him. “Uhh, Zardin… I think it’s for you,” she said, not even acknowledging the man in front of her.

“Who could be at our door at this ho-” Zardin began to ask a question as he got up, but all his doubts were cleared when he saw who it was. “Oh, hello Ranzal!” Zardin said, trying his best to be nonchalant.

Ranzal stuck out the flowers to Zardin. “These are for you,” he said.

“Oh, thank you. I take this to mean you feel the same way?” Zardin asked forwardly.

“Well, I’m willing to give it a shot if you are,” Ranzal replied.

Zardin threw his arms around the larger man in embrace. “I’d love that,” he said to the man.

Ranzal separated from Zardin. “Great, I’ll see you at the same spot as yesterday at 6 o’clock tonight. This time I’ll make the food,” Ranzal said.

“I’ll be there,” Zardin replied, and with that confirmation, Ranzal turned around to head out to his patrol. Just because he had a date doesn’t mean he could shirk his duty after all.

Zardin shut the door to his and Johanna’s room. Behind him, Johanna stood with her mouth agape. “Congrats, my dude! Looks like you just scored yourself a boyfriend! I’ve never been more proud in my life,” Johanna said.

Zardin ran over and hugged Johanna. “I couldn’t have done it without such a good friend by my side,” he replied, “this time though, maybe don’t eavesdrop on our date.”

“Oh, alright. I guess I’ll have to hide somewhere where even you won’t know about it.”

Zardin laughed. “You don’t need to. I’ll let you know every detail when I get back later tonight.”

“I’m holding you to that, Zardin! Now then, we have a job to get to.”

Zardin checked the time. It was almost 9:30, the time they were expected to be at their positions. “Oh lord, we’re going to be late! I’d hate to be scolded by the commander when I’m going on a date with him later.” Zardin rushed to his patrol, carrying the bouquet Ranzal gave him in the hand he usually reserved for carrying his mirror.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> k this is the last chapter i think. i'm satisfied where this ends. more people need to write for this ship tho! i think they're cute together


End file.
